Life goes on…

Sometimes we forget that time just flows. I can’t believe that it’s already 8 months in new office. I still remember the first day here. New atmosphere filled with strangers. At that uncertain time, there was a guy, my team mate who helped me to cope up with the new environment. He never let me feel lonely. I felt happy to have him as a friend. Even though I faced many hurdles in the team, I always felt relieved thinking atleast he is there in my side. Recently we had a team outing and it was great. I started to feel like I have a whole team now along with him. I was really happy as I thought I will now have a set of friends as I had in previous company. But as always I was proved wrong. When I came after lunch one day, there was no one in place. I thought they might have went for lunch or some meeting. Then I saw their lunch boxes there which were heavy and noticed except me no one was there. I checked my mobile to see whether any calls came but none. I understood they went out together and felt really bad. On second thought, I realized it was my fault as I went for lunch with my old friends before them. While I was fighting with my thoughts, they came back and told they went for his treat. I felt broken. When I was dreaming of having whole team I realized I don’t even have a single friend in my team. None remembered me or bothered to call or inform me. I felt like everything is fake.I was not hurt for missing a treat but for being ignored and forgotten. When whole team went how can they forget a single person and won’t they have minimum commonsense to realize that the person will be hurt very badly. Again life brought me back to square one and taught me to stay away from emotions and feelings. Whatever happens, what matters is we have to be in between same people, with artificial laugh and  fake enjoyment and life has to go on. . .

31st Jan 2011…

When you have already celebrated silver jubilee of your life, you know you have lived best part of your life which you can never get back. For many, it’s the decision phase of life. I’m sure almost 99% of who has crossed this golden period of life,  will have an unforgettable day in their life. It can be either a day your dream came true or a day you woke up from your dream to face the reality of life.
If I think of such an unforgettable day of life no other day suit other than 31st January 2011. It was just a normal day, with the daily routines. But when seen through my eyes, it’s the day which changed my life. The day, which forced me to wake up from my dream which I was living for past 3 and half years. Even though I knew beforehand it was only a beautiful dream, I was not ready to come out of it. As we say, umeed pe duniya kayam hein, I was hanging on that 0.0000000001% hope of making it a reality. The day, that left my life blank. The day, that erased all hopes, wishes and expectations in life. The day, that took away all feelings inside me . The day, that changed me and molded me to become another person. Today after 3 years from that dreadful day, I can still feel the emptiness in my heart created on that day as none was able to fill it.

New Year Resolution

Resolution … I never believed or believe in resolutions. As I have started blogging in the beginning of the year, I thought of sharing my New Year wishes (better word than resolution). There are two things in my life which I took with great excitement. One is passport and other driving license. It so happened that neither became a part of my life other than as an id proof. They still remain as show pieces without fulfilling their real purpose. My wishes go like this. First, I want to see my passport stamped. Second, I want to become a real driver from a name sake one.